Privacy policy

[Last revised on 2008.08.18]

One day we might afford to pay a mess of lawyers to write something riddled with loopholes. And probably really boring. Till then:

1. What you tell us is entirely up to you.
2. What we do with what you tell us is entirely up to us.
3. PROFIT!

Fortunately for you we get confused after step one. There’s a definite lack of confusion, however, when it comes to court orders and imminently-smashed knee caps. That’s when we become squealing pigs, mostly because we don’t tote around our cojones in large enough wheelbarrows.

Don’t trust us? Then read our untrustworthy advice on internet anonymity!

Emails:

You can optionally associate an email address with your account. This is primarily for password recovery.

If messages about ‘gaining massive rods’ concern you, peel away a layer of tin foil or use a throwaway address.

IP addresses:

New Enthusiast keeps a log of your IP address and whatever you’re doing at the time. Piss us off and everyone finds out.

If this bothers you, get out of our amusement box or use a proxy.

Cookies:

Aside from being both crunchy and delicious, our cookies are plentiful and of the utmost quality. Also, they help keep you logged-in.

If you’re weird and don’t like scrumptious cookies, check your browser preferences or learn to internet.